Gnar Couch was conceived by two 15-year-olds smoking marijuana stems and a hint of meth under a garbage dumpster re-purposed as a skate park ramp in Durango, CO.
Not having a private place to conceive a bastard child that would grow up illiterate, the young lovers once adorned in mall-punk fashions procreated beneath the ramp wearing nothing but clapped-out skate shoes.
Upon learning of the pregnancy, the father dropped out of school, lied about his age, and got a job at a vape shop. After a gestation period of just five months, the girl also dropped out to have a premature baby. They were both shocked when Gnar Couch emerged from her birth canal.
Eventually, it grew up and moved to I-Street Bike Park in Salt Lake City. Its only mission ever has been to coat the world in its gnar.
Have a seat.
