All posts tagged "mtb satire"
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513GNARTICLESRich Guy Upgrades His Entire Bike, Refuses to Acknowledge He Still Sucks
PARK CITY, Utah — A local rider who spent more than five figures upgrading every component on his mountain bike said this...
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414GNARTICLES
Equestrian On Multi-Use Trail Exchanges Friendly Greeting With Mountain Biker About to Swallow Horse Turd Particles
AMERICAN FORK, Utah — What began as a polite nod and a cheerful “hello” between a mountain biker and a passing equestrian...
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228GNARTICLES
Pentagon Classifies Surron Riders as Terrorists, Greenlights EMP Use for Trail Managers
WASHINGTON, DC — The Pentagon has officially classified Surron electric motorcycle riders as terrorists and approved the use of electromagnetic pulse devices...
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510GNARTICLES
Mountain Biker Undergoes Painful Shoulder Widening and Arm Extension Surgeries To Justify 800 Millimeter Handlebar
BEND, Ore. — Local mountain biker Trent Wontcut underwent a series of aggressive and medically unnecessary orthopedic surgeries this week to justify...
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804GNARTICLES
Local Rider Too Busy Riding Trails To Build Trails
Local mountain biker Lance Idleman once again said he was “too busy” to join volunteers for a trail-building day, despite being spotted...
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1.1KGNARTICLES
Cat II Downhill Racer Crowned Third-Best of the Third-Best, Declares Himself “Basically Pro”
“Cat II downhill racer Chadley Crankson celebrates third place in the third-best group, complete with "sponsorhips," Trek shoutouts, and podium obsession.
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